Something From the Archive

Just so you can get a taste of what I'll be posting, here's something I wrote in 2006. My fervor for the said topic has died down, but I nonetheless still have an undying appreciation.


Wednesday, November 1, 2006

My Not-So-Secret Obsession

My obsession started at an early age. And I blame my family.

As many of you know I am Korean, and apparently Koreans have tiny hineys. I never really noticed. Then all of a sudden everyone in my family was checking out my hiney and said it was the fullest of the bunch. I was grabbed, poked and prodded. Certainly I was flattered, but compared to the rest of the world my rump was not much of a shaker.

My derriere often was the topic of conversation, especially while getting ready for school. According to my sisters, jeans definitely did my body – the posterior – good. So every morning I would look in the mirror before leaving the house to make sure my butt did indeed look good. And then I began to look at other butts to see if they looked good. But only girl butts.

I was stealthy at first, sneaking quick glances and then quickly averting my eyes. But that was all the time I needed. One quick glance and I immediately knew if the hiney was too hard, too soft or just right. But slowly I became braver, even offering comments about my observation to the victim.

Then came the pivotal moment when I realized I truly had an obsession and it stemmed from my family. The year was 2002 and the family was celebrating a cousin's wedding. It was a beautiful and joyous occasion. Food and drink were plentiful and the company, wonderful. After the reception was over, the party spilled over to a hotel suite. The drink was still pouring and definitely having a merry affect on the partygoers. I was completely sober (I cannot drink, but that's a whole different story).The company, though getting thoroughly sloshed, was still wonderful. Then a member of my immediate family, that will remain unnamed but was not my dad, started grabbing other guests' (female) bottoms. And instead of being appalled and wondering how much this person actually had to drink, I wanted to join in on the fun. Again I say, I was completely sober.

Years have since passed that turning point and I no longer try to hide my obsession. I have come to terms that I love girl butts and have an appreciation for all shapes and sizes. But please don't be confused. I may love girl butts, but in a squishy, endearing way – like the way people look at babies' butts. My girlfriends know this and still love and accept me for the weird, grabby person that I am. And they are no longer considered victims but contributors to my obsession. And to them, I thank you.